Book Review: The Rosie Project

Sep. 19th, 2017 08:13 pm
deckardcanine: (Default)
[personal profile] deckardcanine
My mom likes reading up on Asperger's syndrome, if only because she raised me. When she's recommended such reading to me in the past, my interest has ranged from medium (Daniel Tammet's Born on a Blue Day) to low (John Elder Robison's Be Different), but a fictional story may help. In this case, the first-person narrator, genetics professor Don Tillman, studies up on Asperger's in the first chapter, but only when the Graeme Simsion novel is nearly over does he begin to entertain the idea that he may have it; he'd just assumed he was one of a kind.

Cut for length )

I have not decided what to read next. Maybe Stephen King's The Gunslinger, which is probably better than its new movie version.

As She Is Spoke

Sep. 17th, 2017 10:56 pm
deckardcanine: (Default)
[personal profile] deckardcanine
“Engrish” humor? Yes, I dig it.
Does that mean I am a bigot?
I think not; I recognize
That I have made pathetic tries
At other languages as well.
It’s simply hard for me to tell
How bad non-English errors get,
Despite translations on the Net.
the_gneech: (Default)
[personal profile] the_gneech
Kihai, ready for some do-goodery!

Last night was the second session of [personal profile] inkblitz's D&D "off-game." Set in an out-of-the-way village named Greenfork, the adventure was a fairly straightforward campaign-starter type. Goblins have raided the village and kidnapped the miller's daughter, so a band of off-kilter newbie heroes head off to rescue her. The party consists of:

  • Qiphina, a halfling wizard specializing in divination (but who didn't get the chance to do much divining)

  • Lindhardt McGimm, a dwarf fighter with an axe in one hand and a hammer in the other

  • Kihai, a tabaxi monk made of cheerful

  • Graycape, a tabaxi cleric who is made of the opposite of cheerful and is Kihai's aunt and reluctant guardian angel

  • Sequoia, an unreasonably tall human druid (gonna guess he's played by Liam Neeson), and

  • Ixy the Fantabulous, a gnome bard who loves to strum his lute (not a euphemism) talk about his family


First Session
The first session took us to the goblin lair. On the way we did battle with an ill-tempered water snake and encountered a high-level wizard named Thorn, who entreated us, if we were going to go poking around the goblin hole, to look for a "round stone artifact."

The goblin hole itself... )

That ended the first session, with everyone gaining enough XP to hit second level. A very nice +1 Wisdom helmet recovered from the goblin leader was given to Sequoia, as it bumped his Wis bonus up.

Second Session
The party followed the old forest trail west, heading for the ruins to which the dragon had relocated. Suddenly Thorn popped up out of the trees to check in. The party informed him that his "round artifact" was not recoverable because it had hatched, to which he replied that he'd suspected it would. When they demanded to know why he hadn't mentioned that it was a dragon egg, he replied that he wasn't sure at the time.

They gave him the egg fragments (and the side-eye) and carried on. Further into the woods... ) The party wished the newlyweds dragon and wizard farewell, and escorted the miller's daughter home, with Ixy finally renaming the dragon Scintillax the Multicolored. We were rewarded with gold and enough XP to hit 3rd level.

Loose Ends for Future Tying
There are many questions to be answered, of course. Where is Scintillax from? He's clearly not a normal dragon. Is he a mutation? An experiment? His egg was acquired by the goblins after they wiped out the kobolds who initially occupied the cave, right? Since many kobolds worship dragons, could it be part of some larger kobold plan? Or the Cult of the Dragon? Scintillax's multi-colored nature points towards Tiamat.

Who were the glowy magic guys, and how did they come into existence? They referred to Scintillax as "the master" and were perusing high-level magics. One assumes that they were also the ones leaving notes around and complaining about goblins making off with the mask fragments. What's their deal?

Who the heck is Thorn? We gambled on the hope that he's basically good and that he and Scintillax will happily geek out over each other for the next hundred years, but we don't actually know anything about him except that he isn't exactly the bravest of wizards. He could be a Dragon Cultist himself for all we know.

Blitzy the DM, and Inter-Player Dynamics
For a first-time DM dealing with six particularly headstrong players, Blitzy did a great job! As a long-time DM myself there were spots where I would have handled things differently, but I did my best to keep my mouth shut and not cramp his style. Right now he's leaning quite a bit on the written adventure, but that's to be expected from someone learning the ropes. Given that our plan of "throw Thorn at the dragon" was completely from left field and apparently not addressed in the adventure, he did a good job of taking the narrative ball and running with it instead of just shutting it down because it wasn't "the right answer."

In terms of not cramping someone's style, however, I do need to be better about that in re: [personal profile] laurie_robey's wizard. Out of a desire to do something other than spam ray of frost there were a few times when she wanted to pull out burning hands or something else and Jamie and I both were like, "Save that for the dragon or multiple targets!" I was trying to be helpful, but really I shoulda just shut up and let her play the character the way she wanted. So, I apologize for that. Wizards aren't really her bag, but she ended up the wizard in this game because nobody else had claimed the role.

This particular party hasn't really pulled into a cohesive shape yet. Ixy wants to just go off and do his thing, Graycape wants to go off and do her thing in the opposite direction, Kihai wants to talk to all the things, Lindhardt wants to fight all the things. Qiphina and Sequoia don't seem to have an agenda other than "try to find some way to be useful," but that leads to them being overshadowed by the more aggressive players.

Every group goes through this, and every campaign even within the same group goes through this. It's a normal process, but it can be bumpy.

But the game was a lot of fun, and I am really eager to continue! I'll be back in the DM chair for the next session either way, tho. The characters are rich, and at one of the major dwarven cities of the world. Time for shopping! And backstory-revealing!

-The Gneech

Cake Wrecks: A Poem

Sep. 11th, 2017 12:12 am
deckardcanine: (Default)
[personal profile] deckardcanine
What defines a “cake wreck”? Well, first, it is a cake.
Most commonly, the decorator made a big mistake.
The message may have typos or be simply hard to read.
The overall design may not be fully as agreed.
The customer’s instructions may get written in the icing.
The form may be too warped for many folks to find enticing.
At times, there’s clearly talent, but it’s kinda gone to waste,
As someone placed an order that’s in questionable taste.
I figure the majority of “wrecks” are fine to eat,
As long as you ignore such shapes as fungus-laden feet,
But some use weird ingredients or toppers that they shouldn’t,
And some look awfully aged. Who’d bite into them? I wouldn’t.
In short, a lot of cakes appear created by a nut.
The good news is, their photos might just make you bust a gut.

The Road to Greenfork

Sep. 10th, 2017 10:10 am
the_gneech: (Default)
[personal profile] the_gneech
"We'll pass through Greenfork tomorrow," the caravan leader said. "It's a tiny little burg; we'll mostly likely only be there an hour or two before moving on."

"Actually, we're stopping there," said Kihai, with a cheerful flick of an ear. "They need our help."

"Do they," said the caravan leader, not the slightest bit interested.

"See?" said Kihai, holding up a reward poster.

"Aye," said Graycape with a sardonic smirk. "We came all the way from the great desert, just to help a podunk little village with some pesty goblins. No quest too insignificant!"

The caravan leader raised an eyebrow at the older catfolk. Kihai gave a sheepish chuckle. "Not exactly. We were in the neighborhood anyway. We left the desert because our clan was conquered by one of the tabaxi lords."

"Tabaxi lords?"

"Not the same as the Cat Lord," said Kihai. "He's okay."

"Tabaxi lords are foul things," snarled Graycape. "Massive, demonic beasts, like a jaguar from hell. Easily the size of your horse. Cruel. Twisted. Infused with dark powers." She narrowed her eyes and leaned in to the caravan leader. "They feed on your soul," she hissed. The caravan leader gulped.

"Yeah, they're not nice," said Kihai. "The tabaxi lord killed or drove away any of the clan who resisted. Like my parents. There was just no way to stop him."

Graycape's ears dipped at Kihai's mention of his parents. The boy had said it simply, without hint of anger or grief, as casually as describing the weather. She added, "Eh, the desert was a dump anyway. We lived under ramadas and hunted antelopes with spears."

"I liked it," said Kihai.

"You like every place."

"Places are neat!"

Graycape waved a hand at Kihai and gave the caravan leader a look that said You see what I have to deal with?

"The young, eh?" said the caravan leader.

Graycape put a weary claw to her forehead. "You have no idea. I have followed this cub across half a continent, chasing every butterfly, every 'exciting tale,' and every shiny thing. I should be in a rocking chair by a hearth, not tromping down into goblin holes!"

"I just like to help!" said Kihai.

"I know, I know," said Graycape.

"Right, well like I say, we'll be at Greenfork tomorrow," said the caravan leader. "If you'll excuse me, I need to see to the horses."

"Oh! Oh! I'll help with that!" said Kihai, and hopped to his feet.

The caravan leader gave Kihai a warm smile. "Thanks, kid," he said, and the two walked off towards the horses. Graycape watched them go, with a flick of her tail. Her sister had "liked to help," too.

-The Gneech
the_gneech: (Default)
[personal profile] the_gneech
Assassin's Kitty, by Hax
Assassin's Kitty, by Hax


So [personal profile] inkblitz is running a D&D game on Saturday and I am super-jazzed. We have six players, but strangely no rogue (closest thing is a gnome bard who takes after Baron Munchausen). But while I had a fairly decent idea for a halfling rogue "gentleman thief" type, I was suddenly grabbed by the idea of a pacifistic tabaxi elemental monk ("Aang with cat ears," as Blitzy referred to him), and Kihai sprung into existence.

None of us have played a 5E monk yet, so it should be interesting! (We did have a few pop up in the 3.x days, including one who was a monk/cleric with a phobia of undead based on Jackie from The Jackie Chan Adventures and ran around saying "Bad day! Bad day!" whenever undead showed up, and another who wore a tuxedo and a bowler hat and considered himself to be the paladin's butler whether the paladin liked it or not.)

However! The more I looked into the Way of the Four Elements archetype for the monk, the more concerned I got. The play reports had a recurring refrain of "It looks great on paper, but it's pretty meh in actual play. To use any elemental ability, they have to blow all their ki points, leaving them as a TWF rogue without the mobility." That, combined with only getting one elemental ability to choose from every 3-4 levels, leaves them nerfed compared even to other monks (Way of the Open Hand abilities enhance flurry of blows, for instance, so that's ki you were going to spend anyway, just made better). In short, the W4E monk's elemental abilities come at the cost of his monk abilities, rather than supplementing them.

Poking around the internet found a popular community remix of the archetype, and I floated this to Blitzy as a possibility. He expressed concern that it might be overboard, and the more I dug into it, the more I agreed with him. The addition of cantrips and the expanded roster of abilities was good, and the lowered ki costs certainly made the class more useful in a sustained encounter. But a lot of the revised elemental disciplines are just broken, giving monk unarmed attacks range for free, or knocking down foes without so much as a saving throw, and so on. By the time I had finished going through it all, I knew that this was something I wouldn't be inclined to allow as a DM, and as such is not something I would feel good about using as a player.

The real problem, more than anything, is that the Way of Four Elements monk wants to be a semi-spellcaster, like the Eldritch Knight or Arcane Trickster, but for whatever reason, the devs at WotC wanted them to burn up ki instead of just getting spell slots. They're kinda mum of this particular topic, but what hints they've given (through tweets responding to player question and the like) is that they feel like W4E monk abilities are too broad unless you take a serious nerfhammer to them– which is why Shadow Monk spells of the same level as the W4E monk cost less ki.

(This is a little bonkers, IMO. The whole point of spell levels is that they are already balanced relative to each other. If one 3rd level spell is "too broad" compared to another, then that should be a 4th level spell, duh. And if that was the case, why do the play reports of W4E monks have this recurring refrain of "limited"? But devs are gonna dev. )

Looking at the problem from that angle, I decided to see if I could find a version of the class that does the sensible thing and "eldritch knights the elemental monk." I found a homebrew Way of the Elements archetype that does just that, floated it by Blitzy, and he approved it. We hashed out a couple of tweaks to bring back some of the more flavorful bits of the W4E monk and/or make it work better in Hero Lab (my character-building tool of preference), and I think this is just about perfect. I hung a lampshade on the whole thing by calling it the Way of the Elemental Avatar, and Kihai is ready to go!

Mechanical stuff hidden to spare your feed. )

Thoughts and Observations


What I like most about this version is that it adds a lot more flexibility to the class, without necessarily making it more "powerful." A W4E monk from the PHB who takes "Shape the Flowing River" as their one elemental discipline at 3rd level is instantly screwed if the campaign heads off to the desert, for instance. This version doesn't have to spend their lives hoping that their particular corner case finally comes up.

Separating the monk's ki abilities and spell slots also enables the monk to do their flashy bender-ey stuff without giving up their monk-ish mobility. But they don't get a ton of spell slots, and burning ki to get more is so expensive that even at higher levels it's not something they'll just do all the time. I mean, theoretically a 20th level monk could burn through all their ki and all their slots to cast burning hands twenty-one times in a row, which is a little nuts, but that would only make sense in a scenario where the monk is facing down an army of kobolds or something. In that same scenario, a wizard is gonna be spamming fireball or cloudkill to much greater effect.

As an "off-rogue, off-spellcaster, mook-slaying machine of a controller," I think this version will work well. :)

-The Gneech

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